Birch and Maple

Okay, The Gross Post, Now With Weird Links!

ETA: ZOMG superfun links at the bottom.

I'll save the gross stuff for the end, but trust me, it's gross.  And I need your input on what to do  about it, so, fun time ahead.

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Um, had lots of stuff to talk about earlier...
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Well, I guess I'll just move on to the gross.  If you are at all skeeved by body fluids, you may want to skip the rest of this post.

I'm just sayin'.

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Not

kidding

okay

?

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I've had this underarm infection for months, now.  It's rashy, pimply, scaly,  peely and unbelievably itchy, with the lovely addition of being weepy and smelling both of sweat and of yeast.   I can't wear deoderant, I just spray the underarms of my clothing with body spray from Bathed & Infused.  Helps a bit, I mean, I suspect I'm the only that can smell it, but it makes me paranoid, especially now that I'm hot all the time and frequently sweaty to boot. 

I've used anti-fungal creams, which all work for awhile before the infection comes back.  Medicated powders, talcum powder, corn starch, that all makes it worse. My Thai Crystal Rock deoderant only heightens the  effects, so  I've given up entirely.  Wah.

Here's where it gets disgusting.  I'm in the shower the other day, washing the pits, when I realize that not only am I hurting, but there's a big old lump there, too.  I freak out a little, because everyone knows that lumps in the pits aren't good things (tm), but decide to chill for the weekend. 

And then, later on that night while I'm in bed, Mr Oro's on the pc, I'm bored and palpitating my pit, when I feel some moisture.  At first I think it's just sweat, then realize that actually, there's quite a bit of fluid on my fingertips.  I hop into the bathroom and check it out in the mirror.

Oh. My. God.  Internets, the lump, which is actually two lumps divided by the crease of my armpit (because of course they would be in the worst place to actually have a chance to air), is weeping.  Weeping pus.  Yes, I have two...pimples?...each about the size of a dime, each clearly bigger than a corn nut, with an opening somewhere in the middle that weeps.

Man, I'm grossed out just typing about it.  It's worse than the when the lump under my eyelid turned out to be, ah, something similar.  The difference is that I was able to clean that out with a q-tip and it was over, while this looks to be hanging around for awhile.

My question, and I do have one, is what to do about it?  Only one lump seems to be draining, should I just leave it and hope for the best?  Spend $150 and see a doctor?  Break out a clean needle and try and suck  it all out?  BTW, the last?  Ew.

What should I doooooooooo...?

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Gross stuff over.

And now, I must go and order more new bras, seeing as the  soft cup I spent $45 on doesn't, hahahaha, fit.  What's worse, it has 5 hooks on the band.  FIVE HOOKS.  The hooks?  They're wider than my palm.  And the straps cut into my shoulder like a cheesewire into a cheddar.

Oh, and since money is tight, I've bought one Christmas ornament.  It's the center ornament  from Pottery Barn:

'

I'd love them all, actually, but, ya know.

From the OMGWTFFBBQ?! Files:

Just in time for Christmas, the world's most baffling toys!! #3?  Of course, only in Britain.

The Best (Worst) Fantasy and Science Fiction Covers - Mr Oro totally has that Servants of the Wankh book...and I'm pretty sure I've owned, but not read, that Kate Elliot book.

I love Christopher Walken - don't you?

Oro

News To Me

Oh reeeaaaalllly?

Teh Gay Agenda

It's Al Qaeda's fault!

Fertile Myrtle?

Is that a common phrase?  Cuz I just heard a character on Journeyman refer to looking for a Fertile Myrtle and I was quite startled...I thought that was an Island thing.

Randomest of the Random

OO!  Mr Oro has just informed me that today - today!! - he's been offered a job from his old boss in Scotland.  It'll be about a week's worth of programming and, if his quote is accepted, should net about $7ooo US.  Considering my last post, you might say I'm a mite excited over the prospect of say, having money in the bank.  Of course, if he gets paid before 2008, that'll be the true miracle.

~*~

Y'know, if the people in power didn't make statements like this every day, I'd probably be more outraged.   The comments are priceless.

Further Tales From OMFGWTFBBQ?? Files

Eeesh...what a nightmare.

How far would you go to stop bullying?

Dear parents, teh gay is not going to catch.

Wow.  This is interesting if really  true.

Heh heh.

Time to get your 'awww' out.

What Slippery Slope?

What the hell?

An Unpleasant Surprise

We went home today to do laundry and watch a movie and walk Mom's dog and of course I had to pee about an hour in.

What do I find in the toilet?  Not a wee jobby* no, but a large and very dead mouse.

I really can't stress the 'large' part enough. 

Mr Oro flushed it, although I would have fished it out with something.  I mean, we have a septic tank and all, but, y'know, it was an awfully big mouse.  And very healthy, too.   Well, Apart from being dead.

~*~

I don't know if any of you know this, but according to some of the latest news reports, stress can lower your fertility.  I know, you're shocked and surprised.  How come nobody's ever mentioned that before?  And if this is so 'true', why do we have the morning after pill for rape victims?  Cuz I can't think of things much more stressful than that...oh, I know.  See, it's long term stress, not the 'short term' stress, right?

In other news, crocs and rape make you fat.

Aren't you glad that's all been cleared up now?

~*~

I haven't decided what to do about ye old blog, yet.  I might just fool around, so if things are completely different tomorrow, don't be surprised.

Oro

*so true about British Rail.

It's A Minefield Out There

I don't care if you're having a baby, adopting a baby, or babysitting - it's a goddamned minefield out there when it comes to taking care of one.  I knew there was a reason (besides fear)(and terror)(of you-know-what happening) why I haven't exactly explored the world of baby items, and good god, just going on Ebay to look at stuff is making my head spin. 

Apparently, I don't know what the hell is what.  Frex, I thought that bassinets were basins you wash your kid in (okay, we actually planned on using the bathroom sink for this, cuz it's really big, mostly because I ordered the wrong size), but I am wrong, wrong, wrong.  It's a world of froufy crap, frills and lace and canopies - honestly, who cares?  That's just more stuff for dust to get on, if you know what I mean.

Maybe I'm too pragmatic?  I just don't see the point...I, I am clearly doomed. 

Dooooooooooomed, I tell you!

Of course,  I was the same way at my wedding.  We got married at the Aberdeen Registry Office for a whopping $160 (pub crawl afterwards was $500).  To be honest, I wasn't happy with the fit of my outfit, my TMJ was unbelievably painful, I hated being the center of attention and quite honestly, I would have been happier signing a contract in a lawyer's office.  Mr. Oro looked fantastic in his kilt, though!

Oro, the overwhelmed

ETA: speaking of Scotland, here's the Starbucks I used to go to frequently.  There were two in downtown, but this one (first floor only, alas) had the better view.  I used to sit on the couch next to the window to the left of the door and watch passersby.  And here's Dunrobin, the Disney Castle.  Trust me, it's far more fantastic on the inside than on the outside.  Crathes Castle, about an hour (by bus) outside of Aberdeen, is the most homey, comfy castle I've ever been in, the only one I could happily live in.  If you get the chance, Cawdor Castle is lovely, too, and there are gardens everywhere you go.  I never got to Eilean Donan, but surely it's got to be one of the most romantic, I mean, look at it!

I'm One of the Lucky Ones.

Holy cr@p am I glad I left Britain.

Why Americans Are Perceived As Being Stupid.

Set your mind to 'boggle' (work safe)